When I was a kid my mom and I visited a rummage sale. My memory is sketchy, but most likely mom was looking for used clothing for us. Several years ago I felt the Lord reminded me of the rummage sale to instruct me regarding love in marriage. I felt the Lord say to me, “Love her like you loved that rummage sale.”
Mom rummaged through the clothes searching for something of value, something worth her children wearing. Likewise, in marriage, sometimes we have to look past the “junk” in our spouse and see the eternal value of the person God created.
We all bring a certain amount of problems into marriage. We bring sin issues, weaknesses, and fears. We may have brought deep pain from childhood wounds into the relationship. We may bring in problems like anger, deep insecurity, unresolved bitterness, or sinful attitudes. Things we may have thought had been resolved rear their ugly heads.
Marriage is a great opportunity to learn unconditional love. I am certainly very far from perfect. Leslie has imperfections too. But we love each other and we are committed to each other no matter what. I am thankful that Leslie sees past my “junk” and sees my potential in Christ.
Romans 5:8 says, “But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” When we were lost in sin, God loved us. Even now, when we are hurting, broken, or in sin, He sees that within us that is of eternal value. And He redeems our pain, He heals the brokenhearted. He sees our potential. He draws the best out of us. He does not look at us based on what we are; He looks at us based on the spirit inside of us that Jesus died to redeem.
Likewise, in marriage, it is my responsibility as a husband to draw out the best in my wife. It’s my job to look at her and see her potential. I’m called to love her as Christ loved the church, to love her unconditionally. When I look at her, I must see her eternal value, God’s eternal purpose for her life. God is expanding the capacity of my heart to love as He loves. I’m not there yet, but I am learning.
Will you take the challenge, to look past any “junk” in your spouse (or any other person) and, with God’s help to learn to love as He does?
“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, that He might sanctify and cleanse her…”